When Crippled Stars Collide
by StarsComeOut
Summary: Levi HATES Christmas! Because he lives in a poor Orphanage and he can't have a happy holiday like those wealthy people he sees on the street. When he finds a world of emotion is surrounding him, forward is the only way his heart can go. Eren, his roommate, is calling out to him. Can he break through Levi's wall of envy and make him see the happiness under his nose? fluffy, feels


It was around Christmas time and children were running all around the marvelously decorated street filling the air with their joy and delight. They were catching icy snowflakes with their hands and with their tongue, they were throwing snowballs at each other giggling and even some parents came to join their fun while others were giving away mandarins and ginger. The lights and globes in the trees and on the roofs were making the whole town look like a fairy tale. The stars in spiraling waves were making life feel like a dream...

Though, a boy with teary glassy eyes was glaring at this eerie scenery as he was sitting on stairs in front of a stupendous wooden gate with angel statues alongside. The clothes he was wearing were thin and ragged and the dry wind could make its way through them caressing whipping scars. As he was filling his heart with envy he heard the gate opening.

"Levi, have you lost your mind? Come back in here before you catch a cold!", a nun demanded.

He was slowly standing up trying to unfreeze himself and got inside with his head lowered. _'It's actually warmer outside...'_

A young boy with hazel hair ran to the older one with a big smile on his face.

"Why are you so happy, brat?", Levi groaned as he pushed him away.

"Christmas is coming soon!", he yelled in excitement.

"Whatever"

Levi wanted to get past him, but he quickly hugged his legs making it impossible to walk.

"Let go, you shitty brat!"

But the young one ignored him and nuzzled further.

"You are impossible, Eren. I'm going to sleep"

Eren let go of him so he could finally go to his room. After climbing creaking stairs he opened the door held by only one hinge and flopped onto his hard bed.

Out of all days he hated Christmas most because people would flaunt in his face how happy and rich they were while he was stuck in this cold and ugly orphanage. His eyes became wet at the thought but used all his strength not to cry, he didn't want to be noisy, nor worry anyone.. especially that boy with emerald eyes. _'Not that I care about him.. pfff, I just don't want him to be upset.. like me'_

When a sob escaped his mouth he quickly covered it with his hands, put his head on the pillow and forced himself to fall asleep before he would break into tears.

 **-x-x-x-x-**

The next morning a nun with dark skin was walking around ringing a bell to wake everyone up for breakfast. Levi felt groggy, he could barely open his eyes, but he still tried to get up even if he was going to be the last one at the canteen meaning that he would get little or no good food. When he came back to his senses he gasped and stared in disbelief at Eren who had a bruised eye and was limping. The young boy turned his head to him smiling widely and then he left the room with the others.

 _'What did he do?'_

Levi shook his head and stood up to make his bed. When he removed the pillow he found two mandarins and a small bar of chocolate, he was completely shocked. He hid them in the mattress and went downstairs for breakfast.

As expected, he didn't make it in time to get anything, but at least he had some goodies in his room.

While everyone was sitting at the table in the canteen, the dark haired kid sneaked outside to stay by the wooden gate as usual. He saw in the distance a big fir, rich in its green color and branches. It was already adorned by glittering snow but there were a few people outside who brought with them boxes of globes, candy canes, lights and more. Levi was watching them how they were setting up the most beautiful Christmas tree he had ever seen. Its radiance, beaming from miles away was blinding him like a midday sun.

He got back inside before someone could catch him and risk a beating. Breakfast seemed to be over and all children were called in the main hall by the nun's ringing bell. A fin with little branches had been set up to be adorned by children and next to it there was a box with four globes, six little crosses attached to pearl laces, three short garlands and a crippled star. Everyone looked so excited especially Eren, who always seemed to feel only everlasting happiness, but Levi pitied them all.

 _'How can they not aspire to something better?'_

If Levi couldn't have a Christmas like those outside he preferred to have none at all. He went back into his room to eat, leaving behind the ones who fed themselves with the illusion of having a good holiday. As he was peeling off a fruit he heard the door of the room being opened and jolted for fear of being caught with unexplained food.

"Aren't you coming back downstairs?", Eren asked with a pleading voice.

"No!", Levi answered harshly.

"Pleeeaase! Why don't you-"

"Forget it and leave me alone!"

At those words Eren lowered his head feeling very sad and hurt. After a while, he raised it again to send the older boy a piercing look which struck Levi like a clap of thunder.

"Christmas wouldn't be the same if you're not... if you're not.. *sob*", Eren tried to talk, but words came like whispers and a heartache made him choke.

Levi was astonished at the boy's unexpected reaction and felt bad for being mean to someone whose intentions were only good. He got up from the bed and took Eren by the hand. The boy was surprised and glad that his buddy changed his mind and went downstairs together where the Christmas tree was finished. The children were lighting candles around it and sang Christmas carols along with the nuns while Levi and Eren were simply watching and snuggling in a corner.

"Eveybody listen!", a pale nun with blue eyes demanded. "Bishop Pixis is coming tomorrow to bless St. Jerome Orphanage as we are going to celebrate soon the birth of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior and he will be accompanied by an association who wants to advertise the place and boost the number of adoptions. I want you to behave and clean up the place before their arrival to make a good impression. Now, everyone go to sleep!"

And so children went to their rooms and turned off the lights.

"Hey, Oluo!", whispered Levi as he was resting in his bed.

"What's up?", the other one replied quietly.

"Did you find anything under your pillow today?"

"Huh?", Oluo quickly checked but found nothing. "No"

"Oh..."

Then, Oluo went to sleep, but Levi remained thoughtful.

 **-x-x-x-x-**

Today's breakfast wasn't served to children so there would be enough to make a hearty meal for the guests who could arrive any time soon. They were woken up as usual by the bell and were sent directly to the storage room to get brooms and rags to clean up as the nuns demanded. Levi didn't want to get involved with anything like that so he went to spy on people outside again. What he didn't know was that Eren followed him as well.

This time Levi saw how children were knocking at every house to sing a carol and get money in return. While Levi was poisoned by hatred like always, Eren got an idea, jumped the fence and ran away.

He stopped in front of a house and knocked at the door while shaking because of the cold. A horse-faced man with spiky hair answered and looked at the little boy in disgust as he saw the rags he was wearing. He immediately assumed that the lad just wanted to beg so he took out his shoe and threw it at him making him fall in the snow.

"Go away, filthy beggar!", the man yelled as he slammed the door shut.

Eren couldn't feel his hands anymore because of the cool but he wanted to continue. He knocked at other doors and was greeted by the same rudeness until he reached a house where a freckled young man answered.

"Ohh, poor little fella! What's wrong with your eye? Come in and warm up a little!"

Eren was stunned by the man's kindness. He wouldn't have expected that after being brutally rejected for so many times. The good person poured some hot chocolate for his little guest and brought a blanket to soothe the frozen sensation. After talking in a friendly manner for a few minutes Eren got up from his chair.

"I am truly grateful for your hospitality, Sir, but I have to go back before they realize I'm gone"

"Okay, but not before I give you something. And you can call me Marco", said the cheerful man as he left the room.

He returned with a small sack and explained that there were food, toys and money inside so he should be careful with it. Eren nodded and ran back to the asylum as fast as he could.

When he entered through the front gate he could only see the darkness. He tip-toed in the hall until he bumped into the blue-eyed nun.

"Where are you coming from, boy?", she asked with her inhumanly calm manner.

Eren gulped and opened his mouth but he couldn't find his words.

"Where do you have that from?", she continued with the same tone but was getting no response. "Did you trade your tongue for that?", she laughed mockingly.

She bowed her head to get a better look at the boy, fixed a soul-freezing stare and whispered.

"Did you steal it?"

"No, Sister Annie! As God's honest truth! A good man gave it to me"

"Open it!"

"But it's-"

"Are you confused because a word is of more than one syllable?", she faked a worried expression.

Eren had no other choice but to open the sack in front of her. She snatched it from him and looked through it.

"I'm taking this away from you because you went outside without permission. You will also get a whipping later"

"No, please, don't take it away! It's important to me!"

"You are provided with all the food you need here and a child like you has no use for this money"

"Can you PLEASE give me a toy?", Eren pleaded with sorrow.

The nun searched aimlessly through the sack and threw at Eren the first thing she could grab. It was a teddy bear whose belly was ripped and had an eye missing.

"Thank you, Sisteeeeer!", she said trying to hint the boy what he had to reply next.

"Thank you, Sister...", he answered in disappointment.

The nun left the boy alone with his thoughts taking with her the only source of light - a candlestick.

He didn't want to give Levi such a poor and ugly present so he ran into the sewing room clumsily searching for thread and needles. After he found a box with the tools he needed he started sewing the teddy's belly hurting his fingers in process. He still couldn't find a button to replace the missing eye so he used one from his own shirt. He also tied a red ribbon in the shape of a bow to finish the look.

Then he went into the room where he and Levi were supposed to sleep and tried to hide the toy under his pillow but it was too big and would have waken him up. He decided to place it in his arms instead so he wouldn't feel lonely anymore and then climbed onto his own bed falling asleep with a proud smile.

 **-x-x-x-x-**

Today was Christmas day. Levi woke up before Sister Ymir would ring the bell and felt something soft in his arms. He rubbed his eyes to clear his foggy vision and noticed the cute toy. He smiled and hugged it tightly.

Suddenly he heard Eren having trouble breathing so he ran to him careful not to disturb anyone.

"Eren, what's wrong?", Levi asked quietly as he took the boy's hand in his own. He gasped when he noticed that one of Eren's fingers was bleeding, but didn't comment on that.

"Just... a cold", the young boy whispered and then coughed.

Levi wasn't sure what to do since there was no medical assistance in the building and he couldn't wake the nuns and risk a whipping. He gave Eren his blanket and went to a blond young boy who was still asleep and tapped him.

"Armin, wake up!", Levi whispered.

"Mmmwhat?", the blond answered a bit too loud.

"Shh! Eren isn't feeling well. Can you please look after him? You know how to treat colds"

"Huh? Eren is sick? Of course I'll look after him"

"Thank you!"

And so Levi went with the teddy outside so other guys wouldn't steal it from him as long as his bed had no cover to hide the toy and he sat again on the stairs in front of the wooden gate to watch the people who were early on the street. He saw a brown haired girl with glasses who was running with her arms open towards a tall blond man with luggage.

"Daddy, I missed you so much! Welcome back!", she yelled as she hugged him.

"Oh, dear Hange, I can't imagine spending Christmas away from my family!", he declared as he hugged back.

 _'I'm going to be sick...'_

Levi hated seeing them thinking that he had no family or someone who would eventually come for him.

"What did you bring me, daddy?", Hange asked in excitement.

"This teddy!", he answered making Hange's eyes widen.

"Noooo! Teddy bears are stupid! I want a titan! Daddy, I told you I wanted a titan! Why didn't you bring me a titan!? You never listen to me! Stupid daddy! Stupid, stupid, stupid!"

 _'Teddy bears aren't stupid. You are...'_

Levi was hurt by the girl's opinion on his kind of toy and was offended by her ungratefulness. This emerald-eyed boy has sacrificed his health to offer Levi something and this girl didn't appreciate that her father may have gone through the same situation but he just didn't show it. His heart sunk when he saw a little blood stain on the teddy's ribbon linking it to Eren's wound. For once Levi witnessed that inside the orphanage the spirit of Christmas may be richer and more sacred than outside. He even realized that, in fact, the orphanage tried to have a Christmas tree like those outside and Eren gave him a gift and treats so he wouldn't feel poor and forgotten while nobody else received anything. Levi was really grateful for having Eren by his side and he was truly sorry for mistreating him in the past.

He went back inside to go eat breakfast and check on the boy.

After he got his portion of oatmeal he looked around for the young kid. He saw him sitting at a table with his friends, Armin and Mikasa, laughing together and looking like they were having a good time. Unfortunately there was no seat for him to join them, but he was glad to see that Eren was feeling a little better. In the end, Levi sat at the table with his squad.

"Everybody listen! Today, as we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ, our Lord, Mr. Hannes, one of Wall Maria's most respected businessmen has brought along a projector and a film for us. Isn't that wonderful?", Sister Annie announced then clapped. The children and the other nuns followed the gesture. "Now, like yourselves, I don't know what the film is about. Apparently, films have changed a lot and have gone the way of the devil like so much of the modern world. So no less a person than the Bishop himself has chosen the film for us. Sister Ymir, would you turn out the lights, please?"

And the film started. The clergy seemed to be really into it, they were teary, they felt suspense. Children on the other hand were absent-minded, sleepy or restless until a scene with two teenagers under a mistletoe appeared.

 _"Ooohh, Sasha!"_

 _"Ooohh, Connie!"_

Then, they started to make out.

"Ew, gross!", shrieked Isabel as Farlan was laughing at her reaction. Armin on the other hand covered his eyes and Mikasa was blushing at Eren. Levi's squad was shocked and appalled just like the nuns, while Levi felt a mix of depression and disgust still thinking that good things happen to outsiders only. But then he remembered what he had seen that morning and what conclusion he has drawn. He looked at Eren and he seemed a bit sad too, he clearly wanted to hold a dear one the same way.

 _'What can I do for you?...'_

"What is the meaning of this?! Mr. Hannes, this is not the film I have chosen", complained Bishop Pixis as he tried to redeem himself after getting negative response.

"I'm sorry for the confusion! I'll switch right now!"

When nobody was looking, Levi sneaked outside, jumped the fence and ran to find a mistletoe like he saw in that film.

 _'A world of emotion has surrounded me...'_

He went to a house which had a mistletoe hung at the door. As he attempted to steal it, the horse-faced man came at the window with a knife and yelled.

"Fuck outta here! Fucking orphans again!"

Levi gasped and ran away at the speed of light before the man would throw that knife at him.

"Jean, honey, don't be so loud, the neighbors will hear you! And don't be so rude to the boy, he has no family to be with for Christmas! Speaking of that... how about we finally adopted?", wondered the freckled man, Marco, as he came to hug Jean from behind.

 _'Forward is the only way my heart can go...'_

Meanwhile, Levi was looking around for houses who may have an easy to grab mistletoe, but he could see none. He decided to go further in the woods when a violent wind started blowing so hard that it made trees bend to the ground. The boy's pace was burdened by this and the snowflakes which were hitting his skin like arrows, but he made it to the forest.

 _'But I can't go on...'_

When the film was over Eren noticed that Levi was missing. He thought that he may be outside at the gate like always so that was the first place he decided to check, but he didn't find him. The boy found a set of fading footsteps instead and got worried because a storm was coming soon. He followed the trail fast so it wouldn't disappear before he found Levi.

 _'The many things that you taught me will get me through the pain...'_

Levi felt very weak. He was so tired he couldn't even tremble anymore. His body got cold as ice and his hands were turning from blue to a darker shade like a sign of frostbite. Moving in slow motion he was still determined to find what he was looking for.

 _'I can hear you...'_

Eren sprinted through the snow and let nothing stop him. Adrenaline was rushing through his body making him feel no cold and no fatigue. In no time he got into the forest and started to call out Levi's name. Only the echo answered him though.

 _'I hear your voice calling out to me...'_

The older boy leaned on a tree unable to walk further. His shoes were hurting him so he took one out. He screamed when he saw his foot turning almost black from the cold. He put the shoe back, it was a greater pain to see the state his limb was in. Then, he fell in a pile of snow because he wasn't strong enough to sustain the weight of his body anymore. In spite of being paralyzed he was still looking for a mistletoe in the trees.

 _"It brings me to my knees..."_

Eren was desperate as he lost the track. He could see no more footsteps and panic began to envelope him. Freezing was the last thing to worry about. His heart was beating fast enough to pump blood even through stone. He didn't plan on giving up.

Levi's body was half covered in snow. A warming sensation was flowing inside of him. After searching in vain for so long he thought he deserved to rest so he closed his eyes to drift into sleep.

 _'When I close my eyes you comfort me...'_

"Levi!"

Eren has finally found him. The quickly came to him and cleaned off some of the snow. He gently slapped Levi's face to wake him up. He could only hold his eyes half open.

"M-Mistle...", he whispered.

"What?", Eren was confused. When he looked up he noticed a mistletoe.

His eyes welled up with tears when he realized why Levi has gone through so much trouble. Eren cupped Levi's face with his hands and kissed him as if he was starving and the other one's love was nourishment.

Levi was close to losing his consciousness so before that, he wanted to confide something.

 _'Because of you I am strong enough...'_

"Merry Christmas, my dear Eren! I love you more than anything!

"I love you too, Levi! I always have and always will!"

Eren grabbed Levi's arm and tried to pull him but he was too heavy and both of them were too weak. The little boy fell over the older one and couldn't lift himself anymore.

"You know what, Eren? I would always envy those people who had better things than me, but not even them will ever know anything as precious as you are", breathed Levi. Thank you for showing me the happiness I had right under my nose! You make... my life... rich", he confessed and then fainted.

Eren burst into tears at the sight. It was the only thing he could do as he rested his head on Levi's chest and waited for the snow to bury them.

 _'To know I'm not alone'_

* * *

 **A/N: Hello, little stars! I'm so sorry for my inactivity, I switched to another school profile and it's killing my free time! Currently I have a winter break in which I hope I will be able to update my previous work too, but this time I couldn't miss the opportunity to write a Christmas special. Special thanks to BlueIsTheColourOfOurPlanet and SecretWishX for helping me, you are amazing! :D**

 **Don't forget to fav/review if you liked it! Please let me know what you think or if you found any errors!**

 ***Merry Christmas!***


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